Home | 10/23/2005

Dear Susan and Robin,

I am not feeling particularly alert or creative this morning and this reply to your email (thank you) will take the form of a series of responses, observations, commentaries

I am sorry that I have been out of touch for a while…. How is life with you?

Well, I haven’t been too diligent in keeping in touch myself either… Life with me is fine. I am in a bit of a quandary regarding what to do next, what to do with the ‘rest of my life.’ The main thing in my life whose expression is in my projects has a number of phases. The first is ‘understanding’ the world (universe) in which we live (I hold that there is only one world, one universe, and that mind/matter, spirit/body, our universe/other universes are practical but not ultimate or fundamental distinctions.) That phase is substantially complete but what remains is the problem of how to best express the results of my thought. The next phase is ‘transformation.’ One of the concerns of the first phase is ‘what transformations are possible?’ However knowing that something is possible and knowing how to do it are not the same question. Also the questions of desirability (morals etc) and feasibility come up. There are also the questions, ‘what transformations are of interest to me?’ and ‘where does the greatest adventure lie?’ After that phase there are two lesser phases. One is my interest in ‘mechanical construction’ of thinking / living beings. That touches on ‘artificial intelligence.’ The field of artificial intelligence has had contributions from many extremely gifted individuals starting with the British mathematician / computer scientist Alan Turing (who was accused and convicted of homosexuality, forced to take estrogens, committed suicide in despair in the early 1950’s. It’s fortunate to live in a world where people are not persecuted for what they are. Of course, we have a long way to go. The case of homosexuality is interesting. Are people born that way or do they develop that way? Is there choice involved? Often those who argue that homosexuality is ‘OK’ insist that it is genetic while those who argue against say that it is development and that choice involved. If the principle of the thing is that something that does not harm anyone should be accepted then it does not matter. If you argue that homosexuality is OK / NOT OK because it is genetic / developmental then you are admitting that such arguments could determine its ‘rightness’ or ‘wrongness.’ I think that the correct argument is tolerance – and, of course, love. I do think, but this is not in my opinion relevant to the OK / NOT OK issue, that homosexuality and many other orientations have genetic, developmental or extra-genetic but biological, environmental factors and factors of choice. There is research from the 1970’s that shows how the influence of hormones in the womb can make a genetic male develop as a biological female or a genetic male develop as a biological male but psychologically as a female. At the same time even when the individual is genetically and biologically male and primarily psychologically male, environment and choice can incline to psychological identification and behavior as preference for the same sex. In our world we are not so primitive in our circumstances as to need to condemn or eradicate differences even if there was a time when that might have been a survival concern.) The problem of AI is often conceived ‘how to get machines to do things that, if they were done by a human (or other animal) would be considered intelligent.’ The results so far are generally considered to be disappointing in terms of what intelligent machines can do and in terms of early expectations. Failure so far does not mean essential or final failure but I think that, while the problem as just formulated is interesting, it is not the most fruitful question to ask. Instead, I am interested in ‘how can human / other animal and machine together be most effective in any task, especially tasks that involve intelligence.’ Additionally, the main approaches are at the design of software level. I think that hardware –robots, their wiring and so on– is important as well and that design should be complemented by evolution, i.e. building machines and computer programs that evolve (these thoughts are not original.) I think that by using my modified form of the question, by working with both hardware and software and by allowing machines to evolve –including designing the capability for evolution– the emergence of truly intelligent machines will be most likely (which, of course, in terms of my version of the problem of AI is not the fundamental objective even though it is a significant and interesting one.) In practice, of course, we do have human-machine interaction in everyday life, but it is only in the academic form of the question of artificial intelligence that the focus is entirely on the machine or program. I suspect that it is the pure form of the question that appeals to the academic ‘ego.’ There’s an interesting story about robots that illustrates the point in a small way. I forget the details so the following ‘reconstructs’ the original story (the essentials are not changed.) Someone (probably the MIT AI labs) built two intelligent, learning robots ‘Claude’ and ‘Maude’ that careened around on wheels. The designs were identical. However, after the robots had been built and interacted, Claude and Maude developed ‘personalities.’ One of them, I forget which, was extraverted and the other was ‘shy and retiring.’ The explanation is that, just in the way that different cars of the same design develop their own quirks, so the robots developed differences. The only place that the differences could manifest would be in (a) the hardware, and (b) the learning. Small initial differences could later be magnified. One interesting point that was not mentioned in the article is this. Perhaps the builders reacted (possibly subconsciously) to the names ‘Maude’ and ‘Claude’ and treated the robot with the female name differently than the robot with the male name and so set up different learned patterns. I have done some minor experiments in building computer applications to help in my thinking but am not currently active in that pursuit… The fourth phase (if I ever get to that point) is ‘social application.’ It is not an implication of the intent / hope to get to ‘application’ that the intent so far has been merely pure i.e. devoid of intended application. (A characteristically ‘Anil Mitra’ convoluted sentence.) All the foregoing is detailed in the various essays etc. My annual hikes in the mountains are a huge source of inspiration but I have noticed that the hiking is getting harder each year. There are other concerns. I would like to absorb ‘culture’ instead of trying to generate it. The ‘creative process’ has much in the way of rewards but is also taxing and means huge sacrifices of other things that I enjoy: friends, simple perception (the world is so lovely.) (Aren’t we lucky that we aren’t living in Iraq or Rwanda?) I just saw ‘Born into Brothels’ a movie about the children of Calcutta’s –Kolkata’s– prostitutes; it’s interesting and nice that even in that what might be seen as a squalid life there is an enjoyment of life.) And, I’m thinking of ‘retiring.’ Retiring simply means being able to draw money from the retirement fund so that I would not have to work as much and have more time for what I really enjoy. I have been telling Robin to consider that option. I was really fortunate to not get along well with the staff at the local university. That resulted in changes in my life. The changes were unplanned and unforeseen. I began in 1985 with the question ‘What areas of engineering are most worthwhile working in?’ The question generalized to ‘What is most worthwhile?’ and the result is the growth and cultivation from an earlier primitive form of the ideas and ‘passion’ that have driven me these last twenty years. At the beginning, starting in 1985, I lived on my savings from the University of Texas. The money ran out in 1989. I call that four year period my ‘midlife retirement.’ The opportunity to not be beholden to any employer for four years was truly transforming. Everyone should have that kind of opportunity. Anyway, I am meandering somewhat and the point reduces to the question that I face: so many possibilities (some not mentioned here) – what, given the finite amount of time left, shall I do. One example of what I shall do follows. ‘Journey in Being’ the book I sent you was a distillation of a huge amount of work (the much longer original essay is on the Internet) but has again become unwieldy and I despair of being able to summarize the huge amount of material. I think I would benefit from distance from that project; distance might allow me to come back to it refreshed. Meanwhile, I have decided to adopt the following approach. I will list the important concepts and make an outline of the work. I will then write a short version that goes from concept to concept in a ‘cycle’ and, at the end, the essential developments will have been covered. It may require two cycles, the first one would be introductory and the second would provide elaboration, depth and proof.

Our summer started off in fine fashion…

Unfortunately, summer is the worst time of the year for me. My allergies are usually bad (the recent summer was actually not so bad.) The renewal from my annual time off has worn off. My doctor told me the following. Even if one is feeling fine, one’s lungs may still be reacting to the allergens even though the reaction may not be sufficient to cause significant distress or loss in ability to breath. Under these circumstances the lungs may degenerate and the risk of emphysema later in life is increased. This risk is mitigated by steroidal inhalants that prevent inflammation and, consequently, degeneration of lung tissue. Work is stifling hot because the building is old and heat regulation is poor (winter nights there are cold.)

The day after I broke up from school… we held a party here to celebrate my fiftieth birthday and that was a lot of fun

How does it feel to be fifty? For me, forty was wonderful (my fortieth birthday party was one of the best) but fifty was originally a problem. It did not remain a problem and I adjusted and am now quite happy with getting and looking ‘older.’ Fifty was strange for me because I have always felt that fifty is old but not old enough to be worthy of respect or characterized by the ‘wisdom’ that might accrue with years. When I taught at the Rochester Institute of Technology, I was twenty seven, the youngest teacher on a faculty whose ages ranged from twenty seven to thirty one to fifty five and on to seventy. I looked at my fifty year old colleagues who were saddled with divorces, mid life and later life issues, mortgage payments, ill health and decided that ‘I did not want to be like that.’ I decided that I would ‘live life to the hilt’ and kill myself when I was fifty. Fifty has come and gone and I am still alive. I am actually looking forward to being sixty – I still do not like being fifty even though I have ‘adjusted.’ It is funny how one (I at least) gets into such silly mental states – of course, the silliness exists from a certain perspective. But I think it is better for me to acknowledge my state than to deny it. This getting older thing is interesting. I can feel my priorities changing. I am not altogether sure what the changes are but one change is that the balance between attention to the microscopic and the large scale aspects of living is being tilted in favour of the large. There are some interesting things about getting older. Sex is still wonderful but no longer the huge imperative that it used to be. I’m looking forward to being sixty, growing three inches shorter, young men will want to defend me against the harsh things in life, young women will look at me with a desire to be my mother (I think I am joking.) I have never quite bought the modern secular view that all there is ‘is this life.’ If one is thinking logic in its classical sense, any position on the continuation of life beyond death lacks logical foundation. A common mistake, in my opinion, is to think that having a position is illogical. It is only illogical to think that such a position is logical (in the classical sense.) I do not think, though, that my opinion is ‘mere opinion.’ I have been approaching death with curiosity. Is there another side? I am fairly convinced that there is. The logic is in ‘Journey in Being.’ But what is that other side? What is it like? ‘Journey in Being’ has some thoughts on that but they are not altogether conclusive. However the lack of conclusion is not due to a lack in logic but, at most, due to a lack in imagination. It seems to me that the place that ‘we’ are lacking is not in logic but in imagination (which, however, also results in a lack in logic even though this is infrequently realized.) In my conception of logic, which includes but is not limited to the classical, in ‘Journey…’ the old and classical ideas are included but the distinctions between cognition and emotion, and therefore between logic and x break down. I am not sure what to write in place of ‘x’ in the previous sentence but it could be ‘feeling’ or ‘imagination’ or ‘hope’ or ‘the creative impulse…’) This is an exquisite point: lack of imagination results in sterile even if useful logic and limitations in logic and understanding of logic hold back and stunt the imagination. I wonder sometimes whether the history of thought contains numerous exercises in futility as a result of lack of appreciation and implementation of this point. That, for example, the Bible may be a magnificent example of literature but yet extremely limited (even forgiving its ‘absurdities’ regarding whose absolute character there is commentary in ‘Journey…’) The future seems like an adventure

An interesting point regarding absurd belief is as follows. I do not pretend that these thoughts have not been thought before. In ‘Journey…’ there is a defence of ‘Jesus Christ arose from the dead’ ‘Water into wine’ and so on. The defence is not that these did happen on earth but because they are possible and not absurd. That they are possible means that there must be some corner of the universe where such events actually happen. In fact there must be infinitely many places. What is in question is the probability of their occurrence in any given, e.g. this, earth. It is clear that, relative to lack of positive evidence, the probability must be very low. That means that even though there are infinitely many paces where such events must have taken place there is a much higher order of infinitely many places where ‘natural order’ reigned and such / the events did not take place. The foregoing issues are issues of logic. There is a place in Tractacus Logico-Philosophicus where Wittgenstein makes the same point (although in different terms – the terms are different enough that I am not sure that he thought he was making the same point.) I thought originally that traditionalists might see a defence of the ‘articles of faith’ in my thought. However, one of the holds of ‘belief’ is that / when the content of belief is absurd. I.e., if someone can be gotten to believe in what appears to be absurd then surely the hold of belief is strong. So, if a justification can be given of ‘absurd belief’ such holds are weakened. Thus, the defence of the absurd (but not of the truly illogical) may simultaneously ground and weaken belief and the case for belief

Oslo is an easy city to explore...

I am a little envious of your numerous travels but I do enjoy your accounts of them and the photographs that you occasionally send me. This year I did not go to Seattle even though I thought I might. Instead, I focused on the local mountains and enjoying Humboldt County (this county) which is truly delightful when one doesn’t have to work. Whenever I go away I am ‘wowed’ by the beauty elsewhere. Last year, I visited Bellingham, a town north of Seattle and not far south of the border with Canada. East of Canada is Mount Baker that has the only growing glacier in the 48 continuous states even though its elevation is less than that of many other peaks. The area is beautiful and I spent a few days there. Returning to California, I drove along the Smith River (rugged and wild) and, upon re-encountering the redwoods I was struck with how beautiful it is here. The fields in front of 945 Mad River Road where I used to live has the greatest bird of prey count in the world. That count is of course due to the presence of a local university that excels in wildlife studies but the fact remains that on any day one would be likely to see eagles, hawks… and vultures (beautiful in flight), egrets, seagulls, great blue herons… I have been thinking of visiting the Queen Charlotte Islands that are off the western coast of British Columbia approximately 1000 miles north. The accounts that I have read portray it as beautiful and the native culture is said to be unique in its accomplishments

Robin, on the other hand, went back to work…

I think Robin truly enjoys work. I have never truly enjoyed working for pay even when the kind of work includes what I enjoy. It’s not that one is beholden to someone else but that I haven’t found a place that allows me uninterrupted work on what I really enjoy. Since, in my ‘projects’ I am pushing myself to my limit, uninterrupted time is essential. Even though there are things about my present job that I don’t like, it does permit me to focus on the projects since I don’t have to do extra hours and since I don’t take work home. Some developments at work… I was recently approached and asked if I would implement the automated documentation that I had developed in 2002. My original thought was to simply help in the documentation process – to make the documentation look better, to eliminate repetitive tasks. Since I was learning as I was working on the automation, the result was more powerful and more sophisticated than I had planned it to be. The reasons that it was not adopted were ‘political.’ However, management has changed. When I was asked if I might implement my work, I took a look at it and realized that it needed various improvements especially to make it easy to use for people who are less computer literate or are even computer phobic. Since I am not getting paid for the work I have been limiting myself to working on it at work – at times when the work load itself is low (the work load is never steady but we alternate between periods of far too much to do and periods of not much to do.) I have actually brought some work home but I am trying to limit that. I am not going to ask work to pay me to implement the project. I have many ideas for further developments (including making the automation ‘intelligent’) but have made it clear that I would not undertake such developments without compensation. The politics at work are such that such compensation is unlikely. The politics are also such that it is not certain that the automation will be implemented. The nurses in particular (some nurses that is) have always resented the fact that I might be seen as ‘more intelligent’ (or something like that.) This is not merely my imagination for in my most recent evaluation my immediate supervisor told me that she felt that her (nurse) supervisors wanted to ‘suppress’ me. However, the automation has been brought to the attention of the medical director (a doctor) and she wants to go ahead with the implementation. There are some aspects of work that I don’t share with you primarily because they are not particularly interesting. I will do so now since I am on the topic. It would be difficult to portray a full picture. Mental disorders and the manifestation of mental disorders are really quite interesting both in their theoretical aspects and in the human aspects. Interacting with the ‘patients’ is often wonderful even while it is also often quite difficult – people with bipolar disorder (which used to be called manic-depression) can be extremely funny and entertaining and very angry, aggressive and insulting. Characteristically, my difficulties at work have been interacting with staff (I have mentioned some issues from time to time.) However, in general, many of the staff are wonderful people and working there is often great fun. I had never expected that I might be good at such work but it turns out that my work with the patients (being empathetic with a wide variety of kinds of individual, bringing sanity and calmness to potentially irrational and dangerous situations) is considered to be outstanding… many staff say that they feel relief (some patients can be extremely difficult and the difficulty multiplies itself when there are a number of such patients on the unit) when I am working. There are times to be quiet and say nothing, there are times to be empathetic, there are times to be forceful, and there are times when the only option is to physically control an out of control individual. An event that I find amusing in retrospect is an occasion when a large male patient had become upset and angry and was threatening to ‘kick your ass’ and meanwhile another male patient flung himself at me and, lying on the floor, had his arms around my legs and was trying to bite my ankles. I had to warn the biting patient that I might have to stamp his arm while I had to forcefully direct the threatening male. Fortunately, other staff came to the rescue and a physical altercation did not ensue. It is not like that all the time. On a slow evening one of the nurses (Brent) who has an interest in philosophy and I might spend time discussing Wittgenstein or my latest ideas or his recent poems. Recently the position of ‘Hospital Administrator’ has become open and some of the nurses have encouraged me to apply. It is a thought and the boost in salary would correspondingly boost my retirement…

…Sadly, but I suppose inevitably, as they discuss formal separation things are becoming increasingly acrimonious

I am often puzzled (though I shouldn’t be) that such things do become acrimonious. I am saddened in this particular case because, even though I do not know your sister / sister-in-law well at all, you have often spoken of her and thus I have come to know her indirectly

After this, I was home for three days and then set off for Istanbul where I spent a great week. I really love that city for it is so vibrant and atmospheric and feels quite different from home, with its Eastern atmosphere

The movie I mentioned ‘Born into Brothels’ was filmed in Calcutta. I haven’t been there in 35 years and, now, looking at the movie, even though it is filmed in squalid parts, there is an appeal to its atmosphere. I was last in India in 1988 when I visited my parents in Madras. On my way back I spent a few days in New Delhi. One evening I had run out of Rupees and needed to exchange some traveler’s checks for Rupees. I approached a taxi-driver who said he could get the Dollars changed to Rupees. He took me on a very long drive to the heart of Old Delhi through very narrow dimly lit cobble-stoned streets lined with makeshift stalls and shops of all kinds packed with masses of humanity. We passed by the Jamma Masjid which I think is India’s largest mosque. We passed by at the time of the evening prayer. I wondered whether I was altogether safe or whether the taxi driver had some treachery in mind. Finally, we got to a shop where the owner, dressed immaculately, agreed to exchange the checks at Rs. 35/Dollar instead of the exchange rate which was then about Rs. 38. The impressions of that foray into the ‘old world’ remain indelibly stored in my memory. (There is an interesting article by Pankaj Mishra in the November edition of the New York Review of Books on how and why we in the West misunderstand Islam and the world-Islamic movement.)

Unfortunately, I was still not feeling brilliant when I went off to Barcelona with Ali towards the end of September.  He is spending this academic year over there as a part of his degree and is working, for 4 days a week, as an assistant in a Spanish secondary school…

I suspect (and hope) that Ali will enjoy this experience. I have traveled quite a bit in Mexico which I used to visit frequently when I lived in Texas. I loved every bit of it except for the difficulty with the language and the dirty toilets. I would frequently spend two weeks there and by the end of the period would be beginning to be able to converse in Spanish which I would then promptly forget upon return to the US. Even though I never became at all proficient in the language, I love the sound of Spanish. You may know that Latin American Spanish is different from one country to another and it is all different from what its spoken in Spain, especially the Castilian. The form spoken in Mexico is said to be more like the old Spanish of Spain than the modern language (I don’t know enough to be more precise. Learning more Spanish –and Bengali and Welsh– is something I would like to do.) The people of Mexico have always been warm and friendly – I could tell many tales. In Mexico City, however, one – especially if one is white and from the US – may encounter hostility. I was traveling with a friend, Jim Southard, a good friend over many years, white Anglo, Protestant, who lives in Austin; we were at the main train station in Mexico City. The lines at the ticket counters were long. Somehow our line got displaced and we, like everyone else, reclaimed our positions. Some of the Mexican travelers hooted at me ‘Gringa de posa’ i.e. ‘owned by the female white person’ even though my friend was male. I’ve done some traveling in ‘2nd class’ busses in Southern Mexico – from the City of Oaxaca at 5000 feet to the Pacific Coast of the State of Oaxaca experiencing different climate zones – arid at 5000' through tropical in the approach to the coast, complete with verdant greenery and brilliantly coloured birds. Anyway, one time I had run out of money and except for my shorts and a shirt and sandals all my clothes had been stolen and the bus driver got angry with me and threatened to toss me off the bus ‘En Mexico pantalones hai necessitas.’ However, my fellow passengers on the 2nd class clamoured to allow me to continue and prevailed. At meal times the people would take out there lunches or dinners and I would inevitably be invited to partake. Fortunately, my camera had not been stolen and I had to sell in Nuevo Laredo just south of the border with Texas so as to be able to buy a bus ticket to get back to Austin (I sold the $75.00 camera for $30.00 and the bus ticket was, I think, $29.00 and so I had to wait to get back to Austin to eat)

… He is terrible at handling money! However, in spite of this, Chris feels that he has reached a position where he now feels he is earning enough to be able to afford London rent. He has spent the last couple of weeks looking for a flat to share with a couple of friends, one of whom he used to go to school with.  They have been looking in earnest for a suitable property and he rang me a couple of hours ago to say that they have found somewhere in Bethnal Green…

Sounds like an adventure. I have become bad at money handling too. Yes there is a point to being prudent but I think there have been times when I may have let prudence get in the way of enjoyment. When I was a student at IIT, I was recognized for my prudence. I would go to Kharagpur and find clothing items that were very cheap and attractive. However, I am not like that today

In spite of finding the flat today,  Chris is feeling very sad for a friend of his was killed yesterday…I am not meaning to depress you…

No, it is not depressing even though sad and I do not object at all (nor should I) to your sharing news whether positive or negative

…Robin's mother was not the only member of her family to marry an Asian. Jean, the lady we met, married Neville who is a Singhalese Sri Lankan and it was really good to finally catch up with them properly. They were interesting to chat to… I have also kept in touch with another of your Mum’s relatives, the daughter of yet another second cousin… Llansteffan is beautiful and no doubt you know that is where your British grandparents came from

I am glad that you have been keeping in touch with these relatives. Should you / when you encounter any of them again please tell them that they have all –those who I have known– been in my thoughts. I often wonder about them as I do about the Indian side of the family as well. In my fantasy world I sometimes think about living in Ireland (some of the great or great great grandparents are from Bandon in County Cork) or in Wales where, in the fantasy, I would learn and speak the local language and die as a local. While on fantasies it used to be a fantasy to teach at a local university in the hot centre of India, to be unknown and to fade in oblivion. (One of my friends teased that I am achieving the objective of oblivion here in Humboldt County, California.) (I think since I am working in Microsoft Word with your email, I am being instructed to spell in the English way and so the program underlines ‘color’ and ‘center’ with a red wavy line.) …I thought that it was my grandfather who came from / grew up in Llansteffan… whereas my grandmother grew up in Swansea. It is interesting that you, Judi, and your brother married Asians. (Here in America, in contrast to British usage, ‘we’ are referred to as ‘East Indians’ or Pakistanis or Bangladeshis… and the term ‘Asians’ or Asian-Americans refers to persons from Burma (Myanmar,) Malaya, Singapore, Vietnam, Thailand, Cambodia, China, Mongolia, some parts of Eastern Russia – the old USSR, Korea and Japan.)  Burma is such a closed country… if you have not yet seen ‘Beyond Rangoon,’ a movie whose setting is Burma and which stars one of my favorite actresses, Patricia Arquette, you might enjoy it. I wish that those Asian places would deemphasize their differences, would reach out to one another. Of course ‘reaching out’ might be a universal value but I have a special sentiment for the place from which I come

We have been invited to a lunch tomorrow in order to celebrate a friends 40th birthday and so we are looking forward to that. A couple of weeks later we are going down to Havant to celebrate my sister Judi's birthday with her. That will also give me the opportunity to deliver most of the advent presents that I have prepared for Jonny and Rachael, my nephew and niece. They are coming to stay with us for Christmas and I am looking forward to that. Why don’t you do that one year?..

I would love to. I think I want to get the thing (described above) written and implement some of the changes mentioned first. You and Robin could think of visiting here. Even though I am out in the country (relatively speaking) there is San Francisco to the south and Portland and Seattle to the north...

Hoping this finds you well and happy. Robin sends his love. He is working in his study downstairs at the moment!

Thank you for your wishes and love and the same to you. I wish to say this about, you, Robin. You have always been to me one of the people I love the most. Even before you were born I looked forward to your arrival. When you arrived, it made me happy. Of course there were ‘imperfections’ regarding which it is not necessary to elaborate here. However, the old feelings have not changed nor could they change as long as I am who I am…

Love

Anil

P.S. If you have read this you will have received my email via AOL. One of the neat things about this form of communication, apart from the fact that there is a web page dedicated to you, is the fact that I can edit and change the web page. This paragraph is an example of such changes