Subj: Re: Mud River

Date: 98-02-18 19:10:29 EST

From: Anilmitra

To: ahrens@UDel.Edu

CC: Anilmitra

Hi

Its Mad and Mud but no flood or other "danger" here so far.

I'm not sure why but I think its because we have not had a single storm this year that by itself is as intense as the normal most intense storm for a season. Cumulatively we've had more rain and, though the weather service calls it a "train" of storms, it seems like one long one since the beginning of January. But since this is probably one of the most rainy areas in California the drainage can handle it. But its definitely unusual weather. Windy, cloudy, rainy almost every day and the wind is often from the east which is unusual.

Here's and excerpt pasted from my fall 97 hiking journal and from letters written to friends:

"I am back from ten beautiful days up at Papoose Lake in the Trinity Alps... Weather turned "bad" - and even more beautiful. I faced what I felt to be dangerous situation due to the early winter storm. I had so much adrenaline that, when I decided to leave, I was breathing as I would after heavy physical exertion. My one hundred and ten pound backpack (ninety pounds when dry) felt like thirty pounds My balance, and visual acuity were much enhanced. Got to a safe place and spent a safe but cold night in a wet sleeping bag. Hiked twelve miles next day without a break except to wring out socks - wet from rain and high water in stream crossingsà Now everything in Arcata seems much more real than usual. So hungry after coming out I have been eating all the time for two days. Still have two and a half weeks of vacation left and am going to go back out and, perhaps, take a road trip - include San Francisco, visit LuAnne and her boyfriend and their daughter, have some fun."

"Was caught in an early winter storm. Actually two storms with a beautiful day in between sun-filled but cold, snow on the trees and slopes. Evening of that day the second storm came in through the valley leading up to the lake and enveloped the cirque - photograph enclosed - surrounding the lake on three sides. Alternated between snow and rain, gear got wet and I could not stay warm. The way out was over cliffs that might have been icy. Struggled to control fear, remain rational. Despite that the situation was intensely beautiful and powerful and I felt contact with my fate and reality. When I decided to leave, adrenaline had me breathing as if I was doing heavy exercise. My ninety-pound pack seemed like forty. Balance and perceptual acuity were acutely heightened. While waiting I made a list of people I love and wrote them a letter not mailed. Returning to town to dry out, everything seemed very, very real. I felt alive."

"I just got back from the trip I mentioned in the note to Carissa. I have just had four of the most intense days of my life. I was in an early winter storm at the Mountain Lake where I was planning to spend two sun-filled weeks. The whole thing was eerie and intensely beautiful. But a lot of my gear got wet after two days of storm and I felt it was a life threatening situation because the way out of the lake is over a rocky wall which could have been icy due to the storm and therefore treacherous. I felt much panic and struggled to control the panic. Finally when the snow and hail turned to rain I decided to get out on the assumption that if there were ice on the rocks it might melt. The ice had melted but the adrenaline had me breathing as though I had run a mile as fast as I could even before I had begun to walk out. Even without the ice those rocks are rough but I found that the adrenaline enhanced my strength, my balance and my sense of what I needed to doà

"Once out of danger I spent a miserable cold night in a wet sleeping bag; meeting and sharing a meal and a tent with a hunter brightened the night. That night I had a dream. I was travelling in a bus with friends. The bus was approaching a bridge over a chasm. A bicyclist appeared in front of the bus and the driver lost control in attempting to avoid hitting the bicyclist. So the bus broke through the side rail. As we plunged nose down to certain death I had the following reactions. First I said farewell to everyone on the bus but I was not able to speak loudly enough for anyone to hear. Then I said welcome to eternity. Next I wondered how the impact would feel from contact to blackout. Finally I woke up and wondered whether I was aliveà

...I'm still "plodding" away at a number of things: computer skills - using Word, Excel and Access 97 and becoming familiar with Visual Basic 5; upgrading old documents; planning the experience, study and writing, toward writing the next version of Evolution and Design - the document that you saw at my parents place in London; working on some ideas for uses of computers in research - ideas formulated some years ago but needing modification as I actually learn more about computer capabilities and use my computer in my research, planning and day to day tasks...

...My present metaphor for my life is a river system. Tributaries are still joining the river - learning, doing many things. Next: the river itself - consolidation and production r/t main goals experience and writing. Then: distributaries, the river delta - sharing results, if any worthwhile sharing. Finally: the ocean - many meanings some left unmentioned now but one meaning is being over doing. As I write I see meanings within meaning and remember that reality does not always unfold as foreseen; perception also unfolds to accomodate the real...

...Am I rambling yet?

I hope you are all - Ginnie, Conrad and families - doing well.