Subj: Fwd: Condolences and News from Austin

Date: 99-10-16 12:37:28 EDT

From: K Topham

To: Anil Mitra

Hi Anil,

Thanks for your response early this morning to my e-mail of October 12. I sent you the following e-mail last June, but not to the correct address. Sorry. There have been some more recent (but not dramatic nor different-in-nature) events. I will update you on these later.

Keith

------- FORWARD, Original message follows -------

Date: Sunday, 06-Jun-99 02:08 PM

From: Keith ktopham@tnrcc.state.tx.us)

To: Anil Mitra America Online: (ANIL5462)

Subject: Condolences and News from Austin

Hi Anil,

A few weeks ago, I was checking for e-mail and took the occasion to check for Carissa and Danica also. This process uncovered your mid-May e-mail to Carissa informing her that her grandmother had died. I showed your e-mail to Carissa. She didn't respond externally. However, I know she was fond of her grandmother after the visit you and she made to London in August, 1995.

I am sorry to hear of your loss. I am glad you were able to make the trip "home" (to London) to see your family. I hope your father is able to adjust to being alone.

Bev's mother has had an irregular heartbeat for several years (largely controlled via medication), but has not had any major problems because of it. Bev's father had a minor stroke in late May. He was hospitalized in Alpine for several days, but I think he should be home by now.

Bev and I agreed out of court last April to make some changes to custody and support of the children. This agreement was accomplished via court-ordered mediation with a court-appointed mediator (a former judge) and our attorneys present. This concluded over one and one-half years of litigation involving multiple discovery requests (interrogatories and production of documents), an interim agreement, a change of Bev's attorney, multiple depositions, and great expense. The depositions and discovery revealed extreme weaknesses in Bev's case and great risk to Louis as well. If the case had proceeded to trial, my attorney and I think I would have been awarded full custody of both children. My attorney assumes that this was communicated to Bev by her attorney and this is what prompted her to want to settle the lawsuit.

The new agreement maintains the joint managing conservatorship. Carissa is to live with me full-time (as she has been doing for a year and a half). Beverly is paying child support for Carissa. Danica's time is being split 50-50 between Bev and me. Bev has visitation rights regarding Carissa. However,Carissa visits rarely and--when she does--it is for a few hours rather than over night. One element of the new agreement is that Bev cannot attempt to have the court hold me in contempt over Carissa's refusal to participate in visitation.

Over that past year and a half, we ( mostly I) have been attempting to address Carissa's psychiatric, substance abuse, and truancy problems. Optimistically, we have been halfway successful. Carissa has completed three out-patient programs and two in-patient programs for depression and substance abuse. She was an in-patient at a residential treatment center in San Antonio from February 3 until March 5 this year. Twelve days later, she overdosed on LSD and was taken to the emergency room. This was her second visit to the ER for an overdose. Carissa has been on medications for bipolar and depression for a year and a half; she still is somewhat--and occasionally very--resistant to taking her medications. She is on her third antidepressant. She was in individual therapy for 14 months, but last April refused to participate any longer. She attended AA and an out-patient "after care" for about eight months, but last December refused to attend any longer. We have been in court twice regarding Carissa's truancy from school. This has included criminal charges against Bev and me. Carissa and I were so railroaded during one of these cases that I tried to appeal our convictions and was told I couldn't, whereupon my attorney got a judge higher up the judicial ladder to order the lower judge to allow the appeal. This is still pending. One of the issues was that I was charged with failure to appear at a court date that I had not been informed of and at which time I had not been charged; Bev was charged at the time of that court date. What reasoning could lead to my being retroactively charged with failure to appear is beyond me! Fighting these charges, paying fines and court costs, and the posting of appeal bonds have further depleted my finances.

Carissa has been in three different schools this past spring. She was in one of the schools in two separate periods. Needless to say, her academics suffered; she did not earn any course credits. Bev and I are trying to get Carissa's school situation changed for the upcoming fall. We have engaged the services of a psychologist who specializes in dealing with inflexible school systems. Carissa has been evaluated for special education, but we do not have the test results yet.

Bev and I have been encouraged to put Carissa in a group home. Carissa very much does not want us to do this. Nor do I, unless I am convinced it is absolutely the best option. We travelled to visit a group home in Houston. I think Carissa could benefit from that environment, but she refuses to consider it and the home will not take her without her consent. We applied to the Methodist group home in Waco, but that home will not accept her because Carissa's problems are too severe. Bev and I have found that it is extremely hard (impossible to date) to locate a group home we can afford which accepts children with problems such as Carissa's without the consent of the child.

In May, Bev filed a complaint against me with Child Protective Services, saying that I was not providing for Carissa's mental health needs. The case worker decided otherwise. The case worker did recommend that a group home be found. However, she recommended against our allowing the state to take custody of Carissa, which is what Bev wanted to do.

I apologize for not keeping you better informed on events in Austin. This was deliberate, because the custody battle was ongoing, complex, ever changing, with uncertain outcome, and I did not want to jeopardize its outcome by communicating any facts, events, tactics, or strategies.

I am also sorry I was not able to keep in touch with your parents during the past two years. Before then, I usually sent Carissa's school pictures and a little news to your mother. I have been so very busy dealing with Carissa's problems and the custody lawsuit that many other areas have not received enough of my attention recently. Also, there was little happy news to communicate.

I hope you are doing well.

Regards,

Keith